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愚人节整蛊笑话集锦(英文)愚人节整蛊笑话集锦(中英文参照)a guyisreading hispaper whenhis wifewalks up behind him andsmacks him on the back of the headwith afrying panheasks,what wasthat forshe says,i founda pieceof1paper inyour pocketwith betty sue writtenon it.he1says,jeez,honey,betty suewas thename ofthe horseibet on.she shrugsand walksaway threedays laterhesoreading hispaper whenshe walksupbehindhimandsmackshimon thebackofthehead againwith thefryingpan heasks,what wasthat forshe answers,your horsecalled.一个家伙正在看报纸,他的妻子走到他身后,用一只煎锅敲他的后脑勺他问道这是为什么她说我在你口袋里发觉了一张写有的纸条他说哎呀,尊敬的,betty sue是我赌的那匹马的名字她耸了耸肩,走了三bettysue天后他正在看报纸,妻子走到他身么她答道你的马打电话来了a manwas hitby后,又用一只煎锅敲他的后脑勺他问这又是为什a cabin thestreet,he wasbrought to the hospitalhisowife whowas standingup byhis bed,said tothedoctor:i thinkthat heis veryill.i amafraid thathe isdead,said the doctor hearingthis,the manmoved hisheadand said:im notdead,im stillalive.be quiet,said thewife,thedoctorknows betterthan一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院you!他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说我想他伤得很厉害男人转动着头说我没死,我还活着妻子说:医生说生怕他已经死了听到医生的话,这个静谧,医生比你懂得多in thetraffic courtof alargemid-western city,a younglady wasbrought beforethejudge to answer aticket givenher fordriving throughared light,she explainedto hishonor thatshe wasaschool teacherand requestedan immediatedisposal ofhercase inorder thatshe mighthasten onto herclasses,a wildgleam cameinto thejudges eye.you area schoolteacher,eh saidhe.madam,i shallrealize mylifelong ambition,sit downat1that tableand writei wentthrough ared lightfive在中西部一个大城市的交通法庭hundred times.里,一位年轻女士被带到法官面前,她由于开车闯红灯被开了罚单女士向法官说明,她是一名学校老师,请求法官立即处理她的案子,以便可以赶回去上课法官眼中闪过一丝狡黠,说道你是学校的老师,对吗女士,我立即要实现我毕生的愿望了在那张桌子旁坐下,写我开车闯了红灯遍500ontheway homeone night,ispotted somefresh-cut rosesoutside aflorists shop,after selectinga dozenand enteringthe一天晚上回shop,i wasgreeted bya youngsaleswomano家的路上,我看到一家花店外面有一些刚剪下来的玫瑰我挑了一打,走进店里,一个年轻的女售货员跟我打了个招呼are thesefor yourwife,sir先生,这些是送给你妻she askedo子的吗她问道是的,我说yes,i saidofor herbirthday她的生日?她问she askedno,io不是,我答复repliedo foryour anniversary你们的结婚纪念日?不是,no Jsaid againo我又答道as ipocketed mychange andheadedtoward thedoor,the youngwoman calledout,i hopeshe当我将找回的钱装进口袋,朝门forgives you.口走去时,那年轻的女人冲我喊道盼望她能宽恕你after beingwith herall evening,the mancouldnt takeanotherminute withhis blinddate,earlier,he hadsecretlyarranged tohave afriend callhim tothe phonesohe wouldhave anexcuse toleave.when hereturnedto thetable,he loweredhis eyes,put ona grimexpressionand said,i havesome badnews,mygrandfather justdied.thank heavens,his datereplied.和盲约对象if yourshadnt,mine wouldhave hadto!呆了一晚上后,男人再也受不了了他事先支配了个挚友给他打电话,这样他就能借故先离开了当他回到桌边,他垂下眼睛,装出一副阴沉的表情,说:有个不幸的消息,我的祖父刚刚去世了谢天谢地!他的约会对象说,假如你的祖父不死,我的祖父就得死了!teacher ofphysical education:have youeverseen mixeddoubles,boys nick:yes,sir.quiteteacher:please tellussomething aboutit nick:oh,sorry,sir.myoften,i sawit evenlast nightopublished.1体育老师孩子们,你们见过男女混father alwayssays domesticshame shouldnot bez合双打吗?尼克见过,老师,常常见就在昨天夜里我还见过呢?老师:你给大家讲讲当时的情形吧尼克啊,对不起,老师我爸爸常说,家丑不行夕卜扬a guardwas aboutto signalhis traintostart whenhe sawan attractivegirl standingon theplatformby anopen door,talking to another prettygirlinside thecarriage comeon,miss!he shouted.oshut thedoor,please!oh,i justwant tokiss mysistergoodbye,she calledbacko youjust shutthat door,please,•一called theguard,and illsee tothe rest位车上的列车员刚发出信号让火车启动,这时他望见一位很漂亮的姑娘站在站台上一节翻开的车厢门旁边,跟车厢里另一位漂亮姑娘在说话快点,小姐!他喊道请把门关上噢,我还没有和妹妹吻别呢她答复道请把门关上好了,列车员说:其余的事由我负责one dayavisitor fromthe citycametoasmall ruralarea todrive aroundthe countryroads,see howthe farmslooked,and perhapsto seehowfarmers earnedtheir living,the cityman sawafarmer in his yard,holding apig upinhishands,andlifting itso thatthe pigcould eatapples froman appletree,the cityman saidtothefarmer,i seethat yourpiglikes apples,but isntthat quitea wasteof timethe一天,有一个城市里farmer replied,whats timetoapig的游客来到一个小乡村,在乡间路上开着车,想看看农庄是什么样子,也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子这位城里人望见一位农夫在宅后的草地上,手中抱着一头猪,并把它举得高高的,好让它能够吃到树上的苹果城里人对农夫说,我看你的猪挺宠爱吃苹果的,但是,这不是很奢侈时间吗那位农夫答复说,时间对猪有什么意义?will andbill werequarrellingabout whosefather wasthe strongerman.will said,well,you knowthe pacificoceanmy fathersthe one whodug thehole forit billwasnt impressed,owell,thats nothing,you knowthe deadseamy fathers威尔和比尔在为谁的父亲更强壮而theonewho killedit!争吵威尔说喏,你知道太平洋吗就是我爸爸为它挖的洞比尔不屑一顾:噢,那没什么你知道死海吗那是我爸爸杀死的。