读后续写：微场景描写（2）（解析版）

读后续写微场景描写（解析版）［

一、清晨景色描写Behind themountains,the sunpeaked brightly,ready tostart anew day.The bluesky remainedsilent.The windwhisperedthrough thetrees asthe cheerfulsun rose.The birdssang gentlyby mywindow as if theywanted towake meup.参考译文太阳从山后边升起，灿烂耀眼新的一天即将开始蔚蓝的天空依然静默太阳升起时，风在林间窃窃私语鸟儿在我的窗前婉转歌唱，仿佛想要将我唤醒赏析本段描写清晨日出时作者窗外的情景先写远景太阳从山后面升起（作动词用）；天空的声peak和色（因为还很早，所以寂静）；然后使用拟人手法，由远及近写声音，先是林中的风声（silent thewind whispered,与上文的有一种逻辑上的呼应，正因寂静，才能听到风吹树叶的沙沙声），再写窗前的鸟鸣（silent thebirds say）,最后写到人（）这就如同电影镜头，由远及近，有声有色，最后主人gently asif theywanted towake meup公进入了镜头，后面就能自然地衔接上室内的场景和人物的活动了思考在读后续写中，假如遇到时间跨度超过一天的，可以尝试对清晨的场景描写进行模仿运用，先写远，再写近，也可以反过来可以写大自然的物，也可以写人，动静结合适当运用一些暗示情绪的表达，还可以渲染人物的心情（充满希望的），（悲伤的），start anew dayshowing signsof sadnesstelling howjoyful theyare（雀跃的）等［

二、医院场景Nicks firstglance atthe bodyof Chicktook aweight likemountain oflead offhis heart.Chick wasbound andgagged.This wasenough tomake Nickcertain thatno seriousharm hadcome to him,but hewas instantlymade awareof it inanother way.Cautiously Chicklifted aneyelid.A lessacute observerthan Nickwould nothave seenthe movement.Theeye openedwide,and thenit winked.Chick wasall right.参考译文尼克第一眼看到奇克的身体，感觉就像从他的心上卸下一堆铅奇克被绑着，嘴巴也被堵着这足以使尼克确信他没有受到严重伤害，但是他立刻从另一个方面意识到了这一点奇克小心翼翼地抬起眼皮一个不如尼克敏锐的观察者是不可能察觉到的那眼睛睁得大大的，然后眨了一眨奇克没事赏析本段描写了尼克在一看到自己的兄弟奇克的近况时两兄弟无言的互动先描写了情绪，如释重负，再描写了兄弟的现状最后通过更加细节的动作描写，让读者身临其境地感受到兄弟之间的互相关心思考在读后续写中，如果遇到医院探访的场景甚至如释重负的境遇时，可以尝试模仿运用，先情绪，再所见，再互动通过细致的动作描写推动情节，体现人物的关系和情感年月高考的读后续写20207Para2At thatvery moment,the helicopterarrived.A glimmerof raptureran throughmy body.Elli and I rapidlystood upandwaved ourarms violently.The piloteasily foundus andsoon laiddown along ladder.In apanic,we climbedas fastaswe could.As wewere climbingthe ropeladder,the feelingof relaxationspread throughour heart.The helicopterraised fast,and wefinally fledfor ourlives.Finding hisgoal escaping,the bearroared angrily,but nothinghe coulddo tocatch us.Themoment wewere into the helicopter,we collapsed,gasping withrelief.A narrowescape exactlyoccurred!点评本段文字和整篇的情节发展衔接到位见到救援直升机到了，男主先感到一丝欣喜，然后招手示意，跑向直升机，爬上绳梯期间的情绪从欣喜到意思放松，最后脱险之后的如释重负表现得淋漓尽致［

三、休闲时光描写She cradledthe mugin bothhands andleaned her head overitin the risingsteam.Pursing herlips,she blewsoftly overtheclouded surfaceand lether eyelids drop.Her shoulders rose slightlyas shebreathed in,and shehummed withher head lowtI liftedthe tinyporcelain pitcherand poureda briefrotating archof whiteinto theblack depthsof myown cup.She openedher eyes,and welooked ateach otheracross thetable withoutspeaking.参考译文:她双手捧着马克杯，把头凑近杯口，在袅袅上升的蒸汽中，獗起双唇，垂目轻轻地朝咖啡表面吹了几下接着，她嗅了一口气，肩膀微抬，又低下头享受地轻哼出声我拎起小瓷水罐，往自己杯子里添了些水，白色的水柱仿佛一道旋转的拱门她睁开眼，我们隔着桌子沉默地对视赏析本段描写了主人公和朋友享受咖啡时光的情景，把品味的过程写得非常细致从捧起杯子也可用cradle,到凑近杯子然后吹和嗅这里熟词生义的运用以及丰富的动hold,lean...over,purse...blew...breathe inpurse,作描写和细致入微的神态描写值得琢磨品味“我”拎起水罐eyelidsdrop,shouldersrose,hummed withheadlow倒水的动作也很具体，并且对水柱的颜色和形状有一个形象的比喻本lift poura briefrotating archof white段动词的选用非常精准，结合非谓语、复合结构的使用，描绘了一段静谧而沉醉的咖啡时光，让读者仿佛with看到了杯口升腾的雾气，闻到了咖啡醇厚的香气I

四、死里逃生场景And nowNate wasrunning forhis life.He torethrough the thick forest,dodging treesand stumblingover rocks.Hismind swirled with fear.Blood poundedin his ears.And thencame aneven moreterrifying sound:heavy footstepsrightbehind him.Nate whippedhis headaround inpanic.Over hisshoulder,he sawan enormoussoldier chasingafter him.Themans musketwas aimedat Natesback.Attached tothe gunstip wasa killingsword—a bayonet.Nate ranfaster,desperateto escape.But hecould hearthe manspounding steps,and hisgrunting breaths.参考译文现在内特在逃命他穿过茂密的森林，躲避着树木，还在岩石上绊了一跤他的心因恐惧而旋转他的耳朵里充血接着传来了更可怕的声音:沉重的脚步声就在他身后内特惊慌地转过头看见一个身材魁梧的士兵在追赶后他这名男子的步枪瞄准了内特的背部附在枪尖上的是一把杀手剑刺刀内特跑得更快了，拼命想逃跑但他能听到那人急促的脚步声和呼噜呼噜的呼吸声赏析本段描写了在战争中遇到危险，逃离险境的过程先写他当时逃离过程中的一系列动作Nate torethrough；然后写他的心理接者再进行对thethickforest,dodging treesand stumblingover rocksHis mindswirledwithfear,o追赶他的士兵的描写渲染当时死里逃生的紧张氛围，让读the mankpounding steps,and hisgrunting breaths.,Nate者感觉身临其境，也体会到本段主人公恐惧害怕的心情思考在读后续写中，假如遇到危险的场景描写，可以尝试模仿运用可以通过对环境的描写，也可以直接写人的心理，直接描写和间接描写互相结合，以此渲染某种氛围，也可以渲染人物恐惧的心情，让读者产生身临其境的感觉I

五、动物嬉戏获The animalsrushed tothe topof thefarm andgazed roundthem in the clearmorning light.Yes,it was雀跃theirs-every thingthat theycould seewas theirs!In theecstasy ofthat thoughtthey gambolled/gsembl/round and（用力投掷）round,they hurledthemselves into the airin greatleaps ofexcitement.They rolledinthedew,they croppedmouthfulsof thesweet summer grass,they kickedup clodsof theblack earthand snuffedits rich scent.Then theymade atourof inspectionof thewhole farm and surveyedwith speechlessadmiration theploughland,the hayfield,the orchard,thepool,the spinney.It wasas thoughthey hadnever seenthese thingsbefore,and evennow theycould hardlybelieve thatitwas alltheir own.参考译文:动物们冲到小山顶上，在清新的晨光中四处凝望是的，这是他们的一他们所看到的一切都是他们的！想到这里，他们一阵狂喜，兜着圈子雀跃耍闹，在极度兴奋中，他们猛地蹦到空中他们在露水上打滚，大口大口地咀嚼甜美的夏季牧草；他们踢开黑黝黝的土块，吮吸泥块中浓郁的香味然后，他们巡视了整个庄园，在无声的赞叹中参观了耕地、牧草地、果树林、池塘和树丛，好像他们之前从来没有见过这些东西一样即便是现在，他们还是很难相信这一切都归他们所有赏析本段描写动物们看到属于他们自己的庄园后激动兴奋的情景主要通过一系列的动作描写突出动物们的喜悦之情，雀跃；（用力投掷）they gambolled/gaembl/round andround hurledthemselves intothe airin great在后面描述中作者还写到了也侧面描写出了动物们当时愉悦的leaps ofexcitement sweetsummergrass,richscent心情，生动形象地向读者展示了当时的画面场景思考在读后续写中，假如要描写出乎意料的喜悦，激动之情，可以尝试模仿运用可以从主人公的一系列动作描写，环境描写，心理描写出发，丰富细节内容，重点突出他们激动兴奋的情绪［

六、重逢场景Scott squatted on his heels.Face toface withhis dog,he pettedhim,rubbing hisears andstroking hisback.White Fangrespondedwith afunny,purring growl.But thatwas notall.He suddenlythrust hishead forwardand nudgedhis waybetweenhis mastersarm and body.Here,all buthisearshidden fromview,he nestledand snuggled.参考译文斯科特蹲在地上与狗面对面，他抚摸着他，摸摸他的耳朵，轻抚他的后背白牙发出了愉快的低吼声以示回应但那并不是全部他突然将头往前伸，挤进了他的主人胳膊与身体中间在这里，除了他的耳朵一切都是看不见了，他蜷缩着、依偎着他的主人赏析本段描写了斯科特回到白牙身边，主人与狗相见的场景细腻传神的动作描写形象地展示了重逢的惊喜与激动，如描写斯科特的动作描写白牙的动作squat onhis heels,pet,rub,stroke;respond with a growl,thrust,nudge hisway,nestle andsnuggleo思考在读后续写中，假如遇到有重逢或惜别的场景描写，尤其在人与宠物或幼儿之间可以尝试模仿运用,通过细致的动作描写刻画传神的场景，烘托人物内心愉悦或不舍的心情比如（母女惜另）

1.Li Amother squattedon herheels.Face toface withher daughter,she wasfighting backher tears.It wastimefor herto leavefor Wuhan,the coronavirusepidemic centerwhere peoplewere inurgent needof medicalworkers.Holdingher faceinthehands,the motherkissed herfive-year-old kidaffectionately.Then thegirl lookedup,hereyesfull oflight,as（）if shewere tosay shefelt proudof hermother.Suddenly,the kidthrust herhead forwardand nudgedher waybetween hermothersarmandbody.All buther hairhidden fromview,she nestledand snuggled.（折江续写）

2.

2020.1i The boy calledto herdog andsquattedonhisheels,opening hisarms.Surprisingly,Poppy lookedatthe boy,asifconfirming hewas themaster.Then hereyes lookedfull oflight and she gavea thrilledcry.She scuttledtomeet himand buriedherheadout ofsight,between theboys armandbody.Theboypetted her,rubbing herears andstrokingher back.［

七、精神失控场熹It wasa woman,tall andlarge,with thickdark hair.She threwmy veilover herhead andlooked inthe mirror,andIsaw-oh,the most horrible face!Discolored,almost purple,and savage!She hadbloodshot eyesand swollenlips,andsheglared intothemirror.参考译文这是一个女人，又高又大，长着浓密的黑发她把我的面纱扔到头顶上，照着镜子然后我看到了，哦，最可怕的脸！变色了，差不多是紫色，又凶恶！双眼充血，嘴唇肿大，她愤怒地瞪着镜子赏析本段描写了罗切斯特受骗娶的疯女人从全局到局部进行描写，先是身形，头发tall andlarge,with thickdark，然后从脸部，眼睛、嘴唇hair themosthorribleface!Discolored,almost purple,and savage!bloodshot eyesand swollen将一个不同于常人的人物形象刻画的淋漓尽致lips思考在读后续写中，假如遇到有发疯的场景描写，可以尝试模仿运用，先写大，再写小不仅可以写人,也可以写愤怒的动物如浙江高考读后续写描写被喷了辣椒水的熊回来后的场景

2020.7With twobloodshot eyes,thebear let out adeafening roarand violentlystruck thefence withhis fullstrength.With eyesswollen,the bearletoutadeafening roar.［

八、地震场景一It beganwithalow rumblingsound likethunder.Soon therumbling grewinto aroar.The groundshook anddeep cracksopenedup inthe streets.Huge buildingscollapsed,sending cloudsof dustintotheair.Within secondsthe townof Izmitlayin ruins.A terriblechoking smellfilled theair.翻译地震刚开始是像雷似的低沉的轰隆声不久轰鸣声变成了咆哮大地摇晃，街上出现了很深的裂缝高楼倒塌，在空中扬起了团团灰尘几秒钟的功夫这个城镇一片废墟赏析本段描写了地震的过程先是听觉，声音由及近，由小到大，通过使用介词这种比喻修辞方法,形象like,地描绘出地震前预兆和雷声的相似然后是视觉，使用了非谓语做伴随状语，让读者眼前浮现出高楼sending轰然倒塌时的场景，最后是嗅觉应用如果在续写中碰到地震的场面描写，可以直接照搬使用，因为其语言简练，短短几句话把地震的过程勾勒的一清二楚[

九、暴风雨场景摘自暴风雨的壮观景象Glories of the storm---Nancy M.PetersonThe rhythmaccelerates;plink followsplunk fasterand fasteruntil thesound isa rollof drumsand the individual dropsbecomesan armymarching overfields androoftops.Now thefirst boltof lightingstabs theearth.It isheavens exclamationpoint.The stormis here.翻译雨的节奏在加快嘴啪之声，一声紧接一声，越来越急，最后好似鼓声阵阵一滴一滴的雨点仿佛汇成了一支大军，行进在田野和屋顶上就在这时，第一个闪电劈向大地这是苍天发出的怒吼暴风雨来了赏析此段描写了暴雨将至的情景多处使用了修辞先是和这两个拟声词，形象地描绘出了雨点plink plunk的脚拍声然后采用了比喻的修辞，形容雨声之大，其次a rollof drumsan armymarching overfields androoftops也是使用了比喻的手法，后面使用了拟人的修辞方法，指雨像剑一样劈下来stab思考我们在碰到暴雨场景的素材时，可以模仿其写作手法，使用多种修辞，形成很强的画面感衔接运用年月温州三模续写20205Looking overmy shoulder,I staredintotheflashing lightsof a truck.It wasJoe!Seeing him,I burstinto tearsunable tohide fearand helplessnessinside me.“Dont panic,honey!Tm throwinga ropeandyou canhold ontoit toget outofthedilemma.I didas heinstructed,opening thedoor,slipping inthe waterand walkingstraighttohim.|At thattime,The rhythmaccelerates;plink followedplunk fasterand fasteruntil thesound wasa rollofdrums andtheindividualdrops becamean armymarching overfields.Suddenly ablinding lightingstabbed theearth]making menearly fallover intothe knee-length water.[功能语言表达[01时间类突然之间

1.be doing...when.../be about to do...when...I waslying inbed whenan earthquakeoccurred.I wasabouttoset offfor schoolwhen mymother calledme back.

2.一・・・就・・・nosooner...than...（注意no sooner引导部分用过去完成时倒装）No soonerhad theyfinished doingthat thanVictor cameback withRoys mamaand avillager drivingatruckfollowingthem.。