Sex and the City《欲望都市（1998）》第四季第九集完整中英文对照剧本

欲望城市（性爰专家凯莉布雷萧并且勇于发问）“乡间小屋”hearts;hearts;对于大多数纽约人来说曼哈顿就是世界文明的中心For mostNew Yorkers,但对于少数享有特权的贵族来说Manhattan is the centerof thecivilized world.曼哈顿仅是平日消磨时间之处But fora privilegedfew,因为他们周末都待在Manhattan ismerely aplace tokill time时髦的乡间别堂between weekends at theirfashionably rustic,hearts;hearts;这地方看起来很棒New Yorkcountry homes.我愿意放弃这个特权Wow,yeah,the placelooks great.那是整修之前的照片I waswilling toforgo theprivilege.抱歉1Thats thebefore picture.这才是之后的模样Oh,sorry,whew!我可以再看一次之前的吗？Thats theafter.你必须亲临现场欣赏它Could I see thebefore again我可以在这里欣赏You kindahave to be thereto appreciate it.幸好你不用在这欣赏No,no,I canappreciateitfrom here.因为下周你就要去现场了Well,luckily youwont have to,是吗？since yourecoming up there with me nextweek.真希望我能去I amOh,man,I wishI could.但我下周要在城里和编辑开会But,I havea meetingwith myeditor in town nextweek.不好我的天What happenedAre youokay窗户边有一只巨大的松鼠就在那里No,no,oh,my God!那是我的松鼠There was a huge,giant squirrel,in thatwindow,right there.我一直偷偷喂它Yeah,that*s mysquirrel.希望能和它做朋友Ive beensneaking littlenuts out there,你不可能和一只松鼠做朋友and hopinhed comemake friends,and hedid.松鼠只是长得比较可爱的老鼠You can*t befriends with a squirrel.-是吗？-那是我对松鼠的定义A squirrelis justa ratwithacuter outfit.还有什么我该知道的惊喜吗？-Oh,is thatright-Thats mysquirrel我想想…Any moreWild Kingdomsurprises I should knowabout几个小时后我们发现了一个令人满意的Oh,lets see,just,um...在乡下消磨时间的方式Hours later,we discoveredone satisfyingway只是时间还不够久to passthe time in the country.现在的我离家数十里Just,not enoughtime.离睡觉还早得很There I was,miles fromhome,没有聊天的对象无处可去hours fromsleep,；无事可做除了…with noone to talk tonowhere togo,三个小时打了两只蚊子and nothingto doexcept...喝了一杯伏特加调酒之后Three hours,two mosquitoes,我总算找到插座连接电脑and onetoo manyvodka Kool-Aids later,但我的挫折仍无法宣泄I finallyfound anoutlet for my computer,无论多美好的感情but notmy frustration.都必然有一连串的妥协Relationships,no matterhow good,但是我们可以愿意为另一个人are inevitablya seriesof compromises.牺牲多少自我？But how much ofourselves shouldwe bewilling tosacrifice for the otherperson在一段感情中before westop beingourselves妥协的艺术何时派上用场？In arelationship,与此同时回到文明世界…when doesthe artof compromisebecome compromising你下礼拜周末要做什么？Meanwhile,back at the centerof thecivilized world...我说什么？So...what are you doingnext weekendr由于不想再当个“起床便要煮咖啡”的女人Whatd Isay米兰达邀请史蒂夫来喝茶并接受同情Tired ofbeing thewake upand smellthe coffeegirl,或者以史蒂夫的角度而言享用中国菜和动作片Miranda invitedSteve overfor teaand sympathy.我以为你讨厌这种电影Or,in Stevescase,Chinese foodand chop-socky.没错可是你喜欢I thought you hatedthese movies.录影带店的人说这部超好看Yeah,but,you dont.你要吃最后一条春卷吗？And theguy atvideo villagesaid thisone rocks,so...不那是你的Hey,you want the last spring rollrNo,that syours.我不想吃你吃吧该死他们忘了送茶No,I don*t wantit,you haveit.你想喝茶吗？我来泡Oh,shit,they forgotthe tea.好了我要走了Did youwant teaI couldmake some.；-你要上哪儿去？-回家Thats itIm outtahere.你以为我想过来-Why,where are you going-Home.被你当成该死的癌症病人对待吗？You thinkI wannastay here你在说什么？and betreated likesome fuckincancer patient你为何不想吃最后一条春卷？What areyou talkingabout你每次都把春卷吃光Since whendont youwantthelastspring roll留最后一条代表幸运You usuallyeat all the spring rolls!对不起我觉得很内疚Im luckyif Isee aspringroll.当你在公园想要个肩膀哭诉时Im sorry,I feltbad.我却像个泼妇一样对你吼In thepark,you obviouslyneeded ashoulder tocry on,没错and I was atotal bitchto you.谢天谢地Yeah,you were.现在我有个脑袋清楚的医生了You know what ThankGod,我准备动手术because nowI havea doctorwho knowswhat hesdoing,手术费会走保险and Ischeduled myoperation,谢谢你当个泼妇and I have insurancethats gonnapay forit.；So thankyou forbeing ahuge bitch.给我那条春卷隔天在麦克道格位于康涅狄格州的花园别墅里Gimme thatspringroll.hearts;hearts;hearts;hearts;邦妮带夏洛特参观她的温室The nextday at the MacDougafsConnecticut compound,自从我的孩子们长大之后Bunny gaveCharlotte atour ofher nursery.这些兰花就变成我的宝贝Since myboys haveall grownup,今年薇丝汉纳罕的巧克力文心兰my orchidshave becomemy babies.绝不是我“旭日东升”的对手And thisyear,Waxie Hanahans Chocolate Oncidium•它们好精美•我很高兴你这么想夏洛特will beno matchformyRising Suns.我已经移植了这盆给你-Theyre exquisite,-fm pleasedyou thinkso,Charlotte.我不能收Ive re-potted thisone foryou totake home.但我坚持Oh,no,I couldnt.期盼你将送我的大礼But Iinsist.所以先送你一份礼物A giftin anticipation什么大礼？of thegreat giftyoure givingme.亲爱的一个孙子What giftis that别因为崔告诉我而生他的气Why,a grandchild,my dear.他知道我很渴望You mustntbe crosswith Treyfor tellingme.有个小麦克道格来传宗接代He knowshow anxiousI am我根本睡不着to havea weeMacDougal tocarry on the familyname.I couldnt get anysleep at all lastnight.这里的寂静会让人耳聋你在乡下The silenceout hereis deafening.然后我去淋浴却没发现水Well,you arein the country.所以他整天都在修水管Then...then Igo totake a shower andthere*s nowater.我得在脱水之前离开这房子So,now,hes workingon thepipes allday,hearts;我要一份起司汉堡so Ifinally hadto leavethe housebefore Idehydrated.大薯条和一杯四海为家酒Yes,Fd likea cheeseburger,please,什么？large fries,and aCosmopolitan一杯草莓奶昔What你在哪里？A strawberryshake,please.荷荷克斯的“冷冻杯”Where areyou我得开车到新泽西Oh,Im atthe FrozenCup inHo-ho-kus.手机才收得到讯号很明显I hadto freakindrive toNew Jersey想吃到东西的唯一办法hearts;hearts;hearts;to getcell service,and,apparently,就是自己动手做the onlyway to get anythingto eatin thecountry但我没心情烤面包is to make ityourself.我这可能会更糟Im inno moodfor Bisquick.邦妮正为她的孙子Well,it couldbe worse.挑选学校而我甚至还没怀孕呢Bunnys alreadypicking outnamesand schoolsfor hergrandchild,and Im not evenpregnant yet.她还吩咐厨子别在我的煎蛋卷里放虾你有厨子？She wouldnteven letthe cookput shrimpin myomelet thismorning.我这州离你那州多远？You havea cook你那边房子怎么样？How faris mycountry fromyour countryhearts;房子？什么房子Well,so,how is it,how isthe househearts;hearts;松鼠四处出没这里简直是动物农场The houseWhat house四脚的好过两脚的痛苦Hes gotsquirrels runningin andout of there.Its AnimalFarm.你没对他说这种话吧？Four legsgood,two legsbad.没有You didntsay thatto him,did you他以为我爱死那房子了No,no,no,hearts;我不知道我干嘛要来he thinksI loveit.hearts;hearts;你是去和他作伴I donteven knowwhat Im doing out here.我有努力但他在外头干活Youre keepinghim company.那就再努力一点去干活吧Well,Tm trying,but hesouttherehoeing.我们要怎么做So,try harder,go hoe.；把这些铁路枕木搬到那边的喷泥洞吗？So uh...What are we gonna be doing,是的arewegonnabeschlepping theserailroad tiesover to the mud-hole别把自己弄伤了Yes,maam.-Alrighty then.我不会弄伤自己的Alright,dont hurtyourself.■准备好了吗？-好了Im notgonna hurtmyself.-该死•你还好吧？-Alright,you ready-Yeah.没事只有泥巴而已-Shit.-You okayr加油…Yeah,Tm fine,it s just mud.可恶-Okay...-Good,good,good one...我帮不上你的忙了Shit!也许我该回城里去Okay,Imnotbeing helpfulanymore.我要为开会做准备I thinkI shouldget back to the city.还要洗好几次澡I havethat meetingto getready for.四个小时后我清理了鞋底的泥并且向艾登吻别And severalshowers totake.和我的前男友在纽约共进牛排Four hourslater,I kissedAidan goodbye,kicked themud offmy boots,我试过了但大自然和我的组合…and had a New York steakwith myNew Yorkex.就是不自然I tried,I reallydid,but nature and me,我喜欢和艾登在一块its unnatural.全世界我只想跟他…And Ilove beingwith Aidan,对不起I mean,there*s noone in the worldthat I would ratherbe...跟你说这些没关系吗？Im sorry.说吧我没事Is itokay to talk to you about this stuffAre youokay好的我很高兴我们可以谈这种事Yeah,go ahead,Im okay.Okay,good,Im gladthat wecan talkabout thisstuff.如果你认识了什么人…我希望你…And,listen,if youever meetsomeone,我认识了某个人I wantyou tofeel...她是谁I metsomeone.若我告诉你你不能说出去Oh,who isshe她是你梦想中的女友吗？If Itell you,you canttell anyone.她是个演员Is she,your imaginarygirlfriend薇洛桑莫斯Shes an actress.她不是演员她是个电影明星Willow Summers.你有看那部女侦探的电影吗？Shes notanactress,shes amovie star!她演得很好Did yousee thatspy girlmovie我不知道I thoughtshe waspretty good.但她在星光大道上的穿着错误百出Well,I don*t knowabout that.我真不敢相信你居然跟一个…I doknow shewears manywrong thingson the red carpet.与树同名的女人约会（薇洛为柳树之意）I cannotbelieve youare dating...她真的很有魅力Someone namedafter atree.你怎么认识她的？Shes reallysomething.她在首映会上走过来向我借火然后她说Howd youeven meether“我有两个坏习惯She cameup to me ather premierething andasked fora lightand said,I havetwo vices,抽烟和迷恋绿眼的男人她嘴巴蛮甜的smoking andgreen-eyed men.我们聊天喝了几杯酒.・・Oh,shes asmoothie.回到她住的饭店后We talked,hadafew...她脱了衣服红色的内裤Went upto herhotel,off,hearts;hearts;仍然穿着高跟鞋我抱起她将她放到床上…dress comesred panties,够多了谢谢kept herhigh heelson,I liftedher up,I puther onthe bed...差不多有秒Okay,thats plenty,thanks.30我想我的风度还不错Well,that was about30seconds,你在股市混得如何？I thinkI didpretty good.我还是忘不了她Hows thestock markettreating youthese days她为我疯狂The thingof itis,I can*tgether out of my head.薇洛桑莫斯为我疯狂Shes crazyabout me.・肯定有人疯了-我不是开玩笑的凯莉Willow Summersis crazyabout me.当我从她的饭店走回家…-Well,someones crazy.-Fm notkidding,Carrie.你用走的？When Iwalked homefrom herhotel...对You walked我心想“我们之间真的有感觉”Yeah.默契I thought,this issomething.Theres somethinghere.红色内裤和绿眼的默契A connection.hearts;hearts;妈的Yeah,theredpanty green-eyed connection.我想我恋爱了Fuck.当我结束用餐时I thinkIm inlove.我明白我已从假装不讨厌乡下As Iwalked offmy Bigdinner,转而假装我不讨厌听大人物谈薇洛的事I realizedId gonefrom pretendingI didnthate beingin thecountry,或许我回到了城里to pretendingI didnthate listeningto BigsWillow talk.但现在我真的“在受苦”I mayhave beenback in the city,有一件事很清楚,Hbut nowI wasreally suffern.我必须回到乡卜One thingwas clear.但这次我不打算靠它提供消遣I hadto getbackto thecountry.我决定把消遣带过去But thistime,I wouldntrely onthecountryto providethe entertainment.也就是…莎曼珊Iwouldtake theentertainment withme,下一步是什么莎曼珊？otherwise knownas Samantha.你一定是在说笑吧Whats next,Samantha我们要烤一个派You*ve gotto bekidding me.那是你我只是在烤而已Hey,come on,were baking a piehere.这里面比外头还热No,youre bakinga pie,Im justbaking.难道不能开空调吗？Its hotter in herethan itis outside.一杯牛奶不能Cant weturn onthe air conditioning orsomething这里没有空调One cupof milk...No,we cant.也没有牛奶There isno airconditioner.下一班火车是几点钟？Or milkfor thatmatter.不你不能走What time*sthenext train艾登睡着之后你得陪陪我No,you cantgo.你用借口把我骗到这里来You have to entertainme whenAidan goes to bedin aboutan hour.我告诉过你这里很朴实You luredme hereunder falsepretenses.亲爱的少开玩笑了这里真破烂No,I toldyou that it wasrustic.艾登在这房子下了很多功夫Oh,honey,dont kidyourself,ifs adump.hearts;他一个人安装热水器Hey,Aidan workedvery hardon thisplace.凭他的赤手空拳Did youknow thathe putthat hotwater heaterin all by himself-Mn-hmm.其实当时我有戴手套-With hisown barehands.-Mm-hmm.没问题的车程只要分钟Actually,I waswearing glovesatthetime,40你坐火车去开会Thats alright,its only40minutes away.结束之后再回来You takethe trainin foryour meeting,你一切都设想好了不是吗？then rightback outwhen youredone.打包行李小姐Welt youvejust thoughtof everything,havent you你要和我去乡下了Pack yourbags,little lady...是米兰达我得走了Youre corninTo thecountry withme.我们晚一点再谈Alright,thafs Miranda,I gottago.没什么好谈的了Well talkaboutthislater.有的谈1Nothin lefttotalkabout.我马上下去Oh,yes,there is.我上来了好吧Fil beright down.我是名副其实的城市女孩Im comingup.Alright.我是属于都会的女孩See,Im what you calla bonafide citygirl.我是那种平口会去看晚场电影的女孩Im agirl-about-town.我很疯狂Im thekind ofgirl thatgoestoa latemovie in the middleof theweek.我知道Im crazy.・你好•你好I knowit.可以请你转告史蒂夫打给他的保险公司吗-Hi,there.-Hello.hearts;hearts;他们仍然以为Hey,could youtell yourlittle pal,Steve,to callhis insurancecompany我是他的“紧急连络人”They can*t findhim andthey stillthink不过还是谢了是这屋里热还是只有我？but thanksfortheshout out.不只是你Is ithot in here orisit just me我在预热烤箱It isn*tyou.这里不可能更热了Im preheatingthe oven.还是有可能？It couldntbe anyhotterin here.那个有三角肌的农夫是谁？Or couldit小麦唐诺？Whos thefarmer withthe delts那是路克吉摩尔Young McDonald股市崩盘后就来到这里Thats LukeGilmore,hearts;hearts;他话不多人很内向came outhere fromthecityafter thelast bigmarket crash.他在这里做什么？He doesntsay much,kinda keepsto himself.从外表看来是伏地挺身So,what does he doouthere你想干嘛莎曼珊？Push-ups,by thelook ofhim.亲爱的如果我们要烤派What areyou upto,Sammy-Jo就需要一些牛奶才行Honey,if were gonna bakeus apie,有人在家吗？weregonnaneed ussome milk.你迷路了？Yoo-hoo...Anybody home不是我住在隔壁You lost我正自己动手烤派No,Im stayingnext door,却发现牛奶刚用完了and Imbakingapie fromscratch请自便and Isuddenly realized,fresh outof milk.你来自纽约？Help yourself.是的但等我买得起一个小农场就不再是了You fromNew YorkCityhearts;hearts;以前挤过牛奶吗？Yes,but onlyuntil I can afforda littlefarm allmy own.没有Ever milka cowbefore不过某个东西告诉我我会做得很好No.用拇指和食指挤出牛奶But somethingtells meId bevery goodatit.然后往下转握成拳状Squeeze offthe milkwith yourthumb andforefinger.先挤再转先挤再转-Uh-huh.-Then rolldown intoa fist.先挤再转Squeeze androll,squeeze androll.我想我学会了Squeeze androll.先挤再转先挤再…I thinkIcando that.通常这种事发生前Squeeze androll,squeeze and...我会得到一点警告I usuallyget alittle warning我想只要多练习就行了before thathappens.还有其他东西需要挤奶吗？I guessitjusttakes practice.当莎曼珊胃口大开时・・・Anything elsearound hereneed milking崔你在哪里？While Samanthaworked upan appetite...夏洛特的卵也准备好了Trey,areyouup here我在洗澡...Charlottes eggswere ready.时间到了我要排卵了In thebath.快从浴缸出来立刻上床Ifs time,Im ovulating.hearts;hearts;跟我做爱So,get outofthetub,get intothis bed,hearts;hearts;夏洛特我正跟崔说make lovetome right now!你常常让我想起在你这年纪时的我Charlotte,I wasjust tellingTrey原来你在这里howmuchyou remindme ofmyself atyour age.There youare.你在这里做什么？你们刚才在那里做什么？What areyou doinginhere哪里？什么意思？What wereyou doingupthere什么什么意思？Up whereWhat doyou mean你妈在看你洗澡What doyou mean,what doI mean她不是在看我Your motherwas watchingyou bathe!我们在我洗澡时聊天She wasnot watchingme bathe,我不知道你是怎么被带大的we werehaving aconversation whileIwasinthebath.但过了五岁之后陪同洗澡就是不可接受的行为Well,I don*t knowhow youwere broughtup,有时候甚至是四岁之后but thatis notacceptable parentchild bath-time behaviorpast theage offive!要是你以为我会那样教养小孩Even fourin somecases.或我是那种母亲你最好再想想And if you thinkthat Imbringing achild intothat,that Iwill bethat kindof mother,她那样把你带大then you better thinkagain.但我可不是你的母亲She mayhave raisedyou likethat,我是被一个叫伊娃奈尔的女人带大的but I am notyour mother.她是我的保姆Iwasraised by a womannamed EvaNeal.我没什么和母亲相处的印象She wasmy nanny.除了她上完网球课I don*t rememberever seeingmy mother,以及鸡尾酒时间前ever,except afterher tennislesson,她会替我洗澡and beforethe cocktailhour,然后告诉我她一天的生活when shewould drawme abath所以我知道我一直知道and tell me howshed spenther day.你绝对不会变成那种母亲So,I know,I havealways known,是卵巢提示铃我正在排卵that youcould neverever bethat kindof mother.我们最好赶快开工Thats myovaries,Tm ovulating.好吧我得采取正确的姿势Wed betterget towork.等等不是这样Okay,but I have toget inthe rightposition.我必须把腿抬高Wait,stop,not likethat,当夏洛特和崔努力制造宝宝时I have togetmy legsup.hearts;hearts;他们也摧毁了邦妮想要陪儿子的念想While tryingtomakea baby,而薇丝汉纳罕的巧克力文心兰Charlotte andTrey accidentallydestroyed Bunnys,则再次夺冠and WaxieHanahansChocolateOncidium在纽约won firstprize forthe secondyear in a row.迎接病人史蒂夫的是耐心的米兰达Back inNew York,你醒了the patient,Steve,was greetedbyapatient Miranda.你还好吗？■Youre up.-Hmmm.麻药还没退How areyou你来多久了On drugs.没多久How longyou beenhereNot long.一会儿了手术顺利吗？A while.我跟医生谈过-Is thatokay-Hm-hmm.他怎么说？I talkedto thedoctor.他说下面一切看起来都蛮不错的Oh,yeah,how*she我告诉他我看过更好的He saideverything lookedpretty gooddown there.・抱歉-会客时间结束I toldhim,frankly,Td seenbetter.现在你必须离开-Sorry.Visiting hoursare over.对不起我不这么认为Youre goingto have to leavenow.你是他的家人吗？Uh,no,Im sorry,I don*t thinkso.我是他的“紧急连络人〃Are youa familymember没事的米兰达如果你想走…Im his in-case-of-emergency person.闭嘴要不然我就帮你擦澡Its okay,Miranda,ifyouwanna go...只有二十分钟Shut upor Filgive youa spongebath.喝点果汁Twenty minutes.与此同时在他的农场里Drink yourjuice.小麦唐诺和莎曼珊一拍即合Meanwhile,on hisfarm,感觉真好Young McDonaldhad Samantha.你话虽少That wasgood.但却字字珠矶You*reaman offew words,你下礼拜周末要做什么？but theyrealltheright ones.你看我做好派皮了What areyou doingnext weekend现在我们只要放进苹果它就是派了Look!I madecrust!its还真了不起Now allwe haveto dois putApples in,and pie.不不不你不明白Look atthat.r我在厨房唯一制造过的东西No,no,no,you don t understand.就是混乱和几场火灾hearts;hearts;hearts;The onlything thatIhaveever successfullymade你想削几颗苹果吗？inthekitchen is a mess.And severallittle fires.我想去淋浴So,come on,you feellike peelingsome apples现在？I feellike takingashower.你整天都在外面忙Now我一直被关在这屋里Come on,youve been outside allday,我们一起做吧and I*ve beencooped upinhere.很好玩的Look,well doit together.-啊我的天-是松鼠Itll befun,alrightf你还好吧？-Ow,Godammit!-It sa squirrel!不我不好Are youokay我烫到我的腿了No,I amnot okay!我讨厌那只松鼠我讨厌这烤箱I burnedmy legs!我讨厌…这里I hatethat squirrel,I hatethis ovenand...房子你讨厌这房子I hatethis!hearts;hearts;我讨厌这房子House,just sayit,you hate the house.hearts;谢谢I hatethe house.对不起我只是・・・Thank you.我不属于这里我不知道每个开关是什么Well,Im sorry,I just...而且我还烫到腿I just...I dontbelong here,I dont know whereanything goes,I...真的很痛and,I burnedmy legs.坐上来It reallyhurts.在这里Come here,jump uphere.Come on.这样好一点了吗？Where is...Oh,there itis.我很抱歉Is thatbetter我不讨厌这房子Im sorry.hearts;我讨厌松鼠I donthatethehouse.松鼠没这么糟糕I hatethe squirrel.这房子会越来越好The squirrefsnot sobad.hearts;你等着看The house,itll getbetter.也许我应该只在周末的时候来Youll see.Maybe fromnow on,Ishouldjust comeup onthe weekends.或是每隔一星期我根本不必来Yeah,or everyother weekend.好吧I don*t haveto comeatall.周末来挺好的Okay.一趟缓慢的火车Weekends aregood.以及两份速食苹果派后…One slowtrain ride这真是出乎意料地美味and twofast foodapple pieslater...可以买到这么完美These aresurprisingly delicious.hearts;hearts;又大小一致的派Why wouldanybody gotothetrouble ofmaking one何必自己做？when youcan buyone thatsso perfect等一下别动亲爱的and individuallysized纪念品？Wait aminute,hold still,sweetie.拜托我再也不会离开这个城市了Souvenir其实我现在觉得乡下风景挺美的Please,Iamnever leavingthis cityagain.是吗这么说你下周末还会去？Actually,the countryslooking prettygood tomerightabout now.不会是下周末Really,so,youll beback nextweekend不然是什么时候？Um,not nextweekend,no.你还要吃那个派吗？So,when areyou goingback最后艾登和我各退一步You gonnafinish thatpie他花钱装空调In theend,of course,Aidan and I compromised.He spentmoney onairconditioning,我便在沙佛待久一点我发现城市女孩其实跟乡村女孩一样…只不过and Ispent enoughtimeinSuffern外表比较亮丽to realizethat citygirls arejustcountry girls,with cuteroutfits.他得更新档案才行that Imhisin-case-of-emergency person,他也有事想跟你说so,he needsto updatethat wholefile.譬如？Yeah,I knowhe wants totalktoyouabout somestuff too.反正有事Uh-oh.Like what他要跟我说什么？Some stuff.现在洁西卡走了Uh,no,what ishe gonnatellme他又想和我交往？That nowthat Jessica*s gone,他一直想着我？he wantsto startseeing meagain他还爱着我？That hecant stopthinking aboutme史蒂夫得了睾丸癌That hesstill inlove withme我是个自私讨厌的坏女人？Steves gottesticular cancer.往南几条街夏洛特也处于妥协的姿势That Ima horrible,selfish bitch无论你正在做什么不要停下来Several blockssouth,Charlotte alsofound herselfin acompromising position.这是生殖能力强化运动Whatever itis youredoing,dont stop.我知道一个更好的It*safertility exercise.还不行I knowa betterone.我的基础体温表显示No,no,not yet.我再过五天才要排卵My basalbody temperaturereading says那太好了I wontbe ovulatingfor anotherfive days.我们有五天时间可以练习Well,thats perfect.不行That meanswe havefive daysof practice,havetoget itright.你得保存你的精腋No,no,we cant.hearts hearts;让精子的活动力到达巅峰I needyou toconserve yourjuices untilthen,hearts;hearts;亲爱的我现在就很兴奋了so theyllbe attheir mostpowerful.对不起Darling,Im juicynow.我们已经努力三个月了Im sorry,it*sjust,我不想冒险weve beentrying forthree months,不能等到星期六吗？andIdont wannatake anychances.我们要去康涅狄格州看妈妈Cant itwait untilSaturday我知道我在想我们可以留下来Were gonnabe inConnecticut onSaturday.We promisedmother.全神贯注做这件事I know,but Iwas thinkingmaybe wecould stayhere她很期待我们去and concentrateon this.如果我们错过兰花展Shes expectingus.她会非常失望We missthe orchid show,那我们得在你妈家做爱shell bedevastated.hearts;hearts;康涅狄格的人会做爱吗Then I guess welljust haveto havesex atyour mothers.hearts;hearts;凡事都有第一次People havingsex inConnecticut这没什么大不了There*safirst timefor everything.医生说这种病现在很流行Its nobig deal.兰斯阿姆斯壮也得过德鲁•巴里摩尔秀的那个人The doctorsaid itsvery trendynow.人人都在得Lance Armstronghad it,the DrewBarrymore guy.这是很热门的癌症Everybodys gettingit.没错这没什么大不了Its theTiVo ofcancers.你只需要去医院让医生切掉一个睾丸Thats right,its nobig deal.就可以了Hes justgotta getin there,and snipone ofthose guysoutofthere很好所以这算是第一期and thatsit,Im done.hearts;hearts;我上网查过Good,so,then itsstage one,right我猜是吧I lookedit uponthenet.你猜是吧？你不知道吗？Yeah,I guessso.什么？You guessso You dontknow当然这是第一期Whathearts;hearts;要先开刀Sure,I mean,stage one,不所谓第一期是癌细胞尚未扩散到淋巴结you havethe operation.hearts;hearts;对吧？No,stage one,the cancerhasnt spreadtothelymph nodes.你的医生有帮你照超声波吗？Has it电脑辅助断层扫描呢？Your doctorgave youan ultrasound,right你知道A catscan我转过头来咳嗽了一下You know,I mean,他到处捅了捅I turnedmyhead,I coughed,这个医生到底是谁？he pokedaround alittle...他在港务局门口开店的吗？Who thehell isthis doctor他很好Has hegot astorefront outsidePort Authority我经由保健组织找到他的No,he*s nice.那他肯定医术高超I gothim throughmy HMO.史蒂夫是这样的我和事务所里一些有过这经验的男同事谈过Oh,well,then hemust begood.•我的天米兰达•我用的是假名Steve,look,I talkedto someguys inmy officewhove beenthrough this.他们介绍我去看一位专家r…-Aw,jeez,Miranda.-Don tworry,I useda pseudonym.米兰达你不用这么做They gaveme thename ofa specialistat BethIsrael你不必做任何事-who I...-Miranda,you donthavetodo that.我有医生这没什么大不了Youdonthavetodo anything.拜托你不要再这么说了这是很严重的事Ihavea doctor,its nobig deal.这不是脚趾甲发黄的小毛病这是癌症Will youstop sayingthat It isa big deal!你拖得越久不去检查清楚This isntyour crazyyellow toenail,Steve,this iscancer.我们坐在这里交谈的时间越长And the longer youwait tofind outwhats goingon,癌细胞就越可能扩散thelongerwe evensit herehaving thisconversation,然后你就死掉了the morelikely itis thatthe cancerwill spread,这可不是闹着玩的and thatyou willdie.好吧Itisabigfucking deal!Alright...我把他弄哭了我先对一位癌症病人也就是我朋友大吼大叫I madehim cry.然后再把他弄哭No,first,I yelledat him,I yelledat myfriend,the cancerpatient,这是可以理解的and thenI madehim cry.你刚经历丧母之痛Well,its understandable.满腔怒火无处宣泄I mean,you justlost yourmom.也许吧但最主要是因为他惹我生气Im sureyou havea lotof pentup,residual anger.他需要好好被教训一下1Maybe,but mostly,he wasjust pissinme off.就像你对他做的那样It sounds like heneeded agood kickintheass.你知道你需要什么？Which iswhat yougave him.跟我去艾登的乡间小屋度周末You knowwhatyou need你不是真的要去吧？A nice,relaxing weekendwithmeat Aidanscountry house.如果你是指心不甘情不愿被绑架去的话You*re notactually going,areyou没错我要hearts;hearts;去Well,if bygoing youmean beingtaken againstmy willand kidnapped,珍惜现在的我吧姐妹们then yes,Im going.hearts;hearts;hearts;这个周末我是个人质-Oh...-So,enjoy menow,ladies,hearts;hearts;我不能去史蒂夫得了癌症because this weekend Ima hicktown hostage.得有人让他正视问题的严重性I cantgo,Steve hascancer.你会在康涅狄格的别墅Somebody hasto stayintownand makehim feelbad aboutit.hearts;hearts;Youre atthe Connecticutcompound拜托这就像住在巴黎Oh,come on!然后周末去普罗旺斯一样Its likewe*re livingin Paris周末有什么好问的？and runningoff toProvence forthe weekend.我发誓纪念日之后每个跟我上床的人Ugh,what isit aboutthe weekendsnowhearts;hearts;都想知道我周末要干嘛I swearto God,every guyIve fuckedsince MemorialDay他们就是不明白wantstoknowwhatImdoingthisweekend.我的周末是用来认识新男人的They justdont getit.所以我不必一直和以前的人做爱My weekendsare formeeting newguys,hearts;hearts;r所以这是拒绝？so Idonthavetokeep fuckingthe oldones.看来我得独自面对荒郊野外了-So,that*sano/*I guess-Uh-uh.不是独自还有艾登IguessFil haveto bravethe wildernesson myown.我爱艾登No,not onyour own,with Aidan.艾登喜欢乡下And Ilove Aidan.所以或许我也会喜欢乡下And Aidanloves thecountry.等等因为艾登喜欢乡下？So,maybe Illlove thecountry.所以你也得喜欢？Wait aminute,just*cause Aidanloves thecountry,显然情况必须如此you haveto loveit,tooYes,apparently thatshow itworks.你得在一段感情中伪装自己？不我相信这叫做妥协Isee,youneedto pretendto besomeone elsetobeinarelationship.真的No,I believethe wordyoure lookingfor iscompromise.崔爰打高尔夫球所以我就去学Its true.崔爱邦妮Trey lovesgolf,so,Im takinggolf lessons.所以我决定在兰花展的时候排卵Trey lovesBunny,乡间小屋在哪里？so,Tm ovulatingattheorchidshow.这真是讽刺到极点Which hicktown isit exactly在沙佛纽约的沙佛（音似受苦）Its tooterrible andtoo ironic.看来你最好带一些“百服宁”去沙佛了Ifs Suffern.Suffern,NewYork.我们到家了Well,soundslikeyoubettertake someBufferrT toSuffern.这附近有一个湖■Were home.-Yeah...一英里远Theres alake rightover there.这是原装的地板可以追溯到年One mile.1874水电管线是年装设的所以需要整修一下This floorsall original,dates backto

1874.1974我还加装了热水器The plumbing*s1974,so,of course,it needssome work.你觉得怎么样？But Iput ina hotwater heaterallbymyself.跟你想的一样恐怖？So,what doyou thinkAsscary asyou thoughtit wouldbe不天啊不会是更恐怖…No,no,God,no,no.那好It wasscarier...我先把这东西放到后面我再带你四处参观Oh,good.我在这里等你Let mestick thisstuff inthe backand Illgive youthe grandtour.我被困在即使以内战标准来看Ill behere.都很老旧的小屋So,there Iwas,trapped ina cabinthat wasoutdated原本我大可喝着鸡尾酒even byCivil Warstandards,r在派对上招蜂引蝶的when Icould vebeenoutcocktailing,怎么了？发生什么事？你还好吧？and samplesale-ing.。