文本内容:
续写评分标准和好句积累Describeactionsindetail.具体的动作描写
一、Showemotionbyactionfocusonfacebodyandvoice(通过动作表情绪,聚焦面对、身体和声音)Mybelovedmomwearingashiningsmileorherscarletfaceadded.“Thenarratorspartisimportanttoo.(面部)Sohappywasthelittlegirlthatshealmostjumpedupwithtearsfillinghisgy毁(眼睛)Maccollapsedontheseatfeelinganenormousweightshiftedfromhisshoulder.(身体)TomparkeddownthestreetrushedtoBobbysfrontdoortremblingwithexcitement.(身体)Unabletocontainhistemperandwanderedaroundroaringinanger“Whoonearthdidit”
二、Useconsecutiveaction(使用动作链,细化动作,把动作分解成一连串细微的动作,写出动作的过程,形成动作连,使人物更有画面感,立体感)HearingthescreamsHenryrantotheriversidethrewoffhisclothesandjumpedintothewaterwithouthesitation.Withoutdelaykickedthedooropenwithgreatforceonlytofindthelittlegirllyingonthefloor.ImmediatelyTompickedhe】upshieldedhe】noseformchokingsmokeandrusheddownstairs.Hereacheddeepintodeepintohispocketpulledoutofahandfulofchangeandheldituptothefarmer.
三、Addappropriateadverbs(副词的使用,增添副词,修饰动词,使得表达更加丰富、描写更加生动)HerwordkindlyexpressedstillhurtespeciallywhenIsawmypartgotoanothergirl.Yeseveryflowergivespleasureinitsownwaydoesntitsheaskedthoughtfully(若有所「思、土也)Noteveryonecanbeaprincessbutthereisnoshameinthat.Shelistenedandsmiledreassuringly(安慰上也)Mymotherlookedatmeseriously.
四、Describethoughtsvividly生动的心理描写(心理描写是把人物的思想感情、心理活动通过文字描绘出来)Maccouldfeelthethumpingofhisheartagainsthischestandsweatdrench(湿透)hisclotheso(紧张)Susansatonthegrassreflectingonwhatshehadcheatedhergrandmotherandwishingshewereathomeadmittingherfault.(内疚)AtthesightofthefiercewolfIwasseizedbyastrongsenseofhorrorandmypalmsweresweating.(恐惧)Uponhearingthebadnewshewassuddenlythrownintoaworldofdarknessandsankintohopelessness.(绝望)
五、Describesurroundingsproperly适当的场景描写(描写场景,形成生动而充满感染力的画面,体现人物的心情)ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.Thesunshonelightlybringingwarmthandhopetotheworld.ThoughdecadespassTconstantlyrecallourpreciouslunchtimesbeingtogetherbathedinthesoftmiddaynight.Janeheldhimtightlyandtoldhimhowmuchshelovedhim.Atthemomentthemountainwasfilledwithlove.Prettybirdsweresingingmerrysongsandflowerswerebloomingwithsmile.Theytalkedaboutitforhoursgrinningfromeartoear.
六、Usefigurativespeech使用修辞手法Whensheheardthemsay“ThankstoSantaClausehereyesweresparklinglikediamond.(明n俞)Whenhismotherkissedhimonthecheekitseemedasifthebabywasonthetopthetopoftheworld.(明□俞、夸张)Thesunbrokethroughthecloudsandjumpedoutofthesea.(拟人)Shewenthomeinafloodoftears.(泪如泉涌)(夸张)Herhairwasaflowinggoldenriverstreamingdownhershoulders.(明喻)
七、Diversifysentencestructure句式多样化ForafewmomentsIjuststoodthereconfusedholdingthatten-dollarbillwonderingwhattobuyandwhotobuysomethingfor.(非谓语动词、不定式)Quicklyweranintothecarwithourheatsbeatingwildly.(with复合结构)Theyhuggedeachothertightlytearsrollingdowntheircheeks.(独立主格结构)Innotimehegotannoyedandstormedintoourroomquestioningusinangerwhoitwasthatmadesuchamessofhisflowers.(非谓语动词、从句、强调句)
七、无灵主语句Romewitnessedmanygreathistoricevents.Awaveofnervousnesswashedoverhim.Achillofhoirorsuddenlysweptoverhim.Laughterlingeredaroundtheroom.Thatchillyafternoonwitnessedhimtrudginginthesnow.Nighthasfallenoverthecountry.Asuddenshowerkilledthewind.
8.Aheavyrainvisitedthecity.
八、Usefulpatternsfordifferentendingtypes.
1.自然结尾Wemadeithomesafeandsound.Wewerereunitedandwehadabigfamilydinnertocelebrateourrescue.Whatascaring/thrilling/anunforgettableexperience.
2.主题升华结尾ItsAnotBthatmakeagreatdifference.强调句ItwasthenthatIhadaburstofunderstandingthat..…强调句。